(February 7, 2014)
I have, throughout my life, been dealing with various forms of negative habits or vices. These vices, from time to time, dominated my life and my think and became the end goal, rather than merely a means for some thing or another. And, like most vices, it granted not happiness but rather left a trail of misery.
With that in mind, it is apparent what Nephi is talking about when he describes appetites which cannot be satisfied – eating in a dream and awakening to still be faint with hunger. That is a description that I vaguely understood before, but as I emerge from the darkness and finally begin to allow the Atonement to address the self-inflicted wounds of my past mistakes, it seems far more apt. Those things did not satisfy, and rather than learn from that I just consumed more and more hoping that I would someday awaken no longer hungry. It never occurred. I am grateful, though, for the patience of the Lord in teaching me so that I can begin to consume real food.
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