2 Nephi 4

(January 24, 2015)

                The longer I go in my life, the more I understand Nephi’s lament.  You would think that, after all of the witnesses that I have had during my lifetime that my faith would have been unshakeable.  And yet a little over a year ago I needed to go through a crisis of faith that nearly destroyed me.  You would think, after the number of times I have been shown that righteousness leads to happiness and wickedness leads to misery that I would learn that the allure of wickedness is just a poisonous mirage.  But yet I still have to deal with the challenges of temptations that should have long ago been put to bed.

                Nephi’s frustration in himself is the frustration that I think each of us feel when our behavior or our emotions are not up to the level of our convictions.  We know the truth, and we should be able and willing to live it regardless.  And yet, in the pressure situations I know that many times I fail – my best results are often nothing more than me getting up after I fail.  But I think that is a natural part of the spiritual maturation process – we struggle to reach the point of sanctification where we truly live the way we know.